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KENDRICK LAMAR - Good Kid M.a.a.d City
#13
haha le Kid Mero a remis ça:

YO SO SINCE ALOT OF MUSIC SUCKS AND NIGGAS IN MY AGE BRACKET EITHER SUCK THE PENIS OF EVERY NEW NIGGA OUT OR IMMEDIATELY DERIDE THEM AS GARBAGE…I FEEL LIKE AS THE KNOWLEDGEGOD I SHOULD BE OUT HERE IN THIS WILD DIGITAL FOREST INTERNET LETTING MY KNOWLEDGE DISCIPLES AND MEROS MAMIS KNOW WHATS REALLY GOOD.

I DON'T USUALLY DO REVIEWS UNLESS NIGGAS ASK FOR IT AND SO MANY PEOPLE ASKED ME TO REVIEW THIS ALBUM I THOUGHT "KENDRICK LAMAR" WAS THE NEW NAME JAYZ AND KANYE WERE USING CUZ THEY REALIZED "THE THRONE" SOUNDS LIKE A KARAOKE BAR FOR LARPERS. BUT NAH THERE'S ACTUALLY A DUDE NAMED KENDRICK LAMAR WHO I HAVE NEVER HEARD IN MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE SO BASICALLY YOU KNOW YOU BOUT TO GET AN UNBIASED REVIEW CUZ A) I'M NOT A DICK RIDER AND B) I'M NOT A DICK RIDER.



SHERANE AKA MASTER SPLINTERS DAUGHTER

UH OH RELIGIOUS SHIT…THIS SHIT JUST OPENED UP WITH ROBOTS PRAYING B. I HAD TO MAKE SURE THIS WASN'T A ANDRE3000 ALBUM. THIS BEAT IS DOPE THO I FUCK WIT IT. YO IS THIS THIS DUDES REAL VOICE THO? HE SOUNDS LIKE WHAT I IMAGINE THE KIA HAMSTERS TO SOUND LIKE AFTER A FEW BONG RIPS. IDK IF ITS SOME KIND OF EFFECT BUT ITS ANNOYING. THE VOICEMAIL AT THE END WOULDA MADE ME CHUCKLE BUT MY LIFE IS A CONSTANT STRUGGLE AND THEREFORE I KNOW NO JOYOUS LAUGHTER B. ALSO THIS SONG TITLE STUPID AS FUCK.




BITCH DON'T KILL MY VIBE

UH OK SO YOU STICKING WITH THE ROBOT FLOW? OHHHHH THIS BEAT JUST DROPPED AND ITS FUCKIN SMOOTHER THAN GETTIN A BLOWJOB IN FRONT OF AN A/C IN JULY. THIS NIGGA BOUT TO KILL MY VIBE THO CUZ HE SOUNDS LIKE THIS BITCH. THIS IS A COOL SONG THO I'M NOT MAD AT IT THIS COULD GO ON MY "LEISURELY BJ FROM 19YR OLD DOMINICAN GIRL" PLAYLIST RIGHT AFTER FAZE-O "RIDING HIGH". YO IT LOOKS LIKE THIS ALBUM IS ACTUALLY AN ALBUM. SKITS IN BETWEEN SONGS THAT CREATE A VIBE FOR A NIGGA TO BE ABLE TO ENJOY THE ALBUM IN ITS ENTIRETY WITHOUT SKIPPIN BACK AND FORTH BETWEEN
JOINTS.



BACKSEAT FREESTYLE

SPOKE TOO SOON…YO YO YOOOOO HOLD UP C3PO WHY YOU SO HYPE? WHO THE FUCK IS PAYING HITBOY FOR THESE SWIZZ BEATS? *720 BETWEEN THE LEGS TOMAHAWK SLAMS THIS BEAT IN THE GARBAGE* GRRRR RAPPITY RAPPIN RAP RAPPIN YELLOWWOLF ANGRY KANYE FLOW…NAH MY NIGGA GET THIS SHIT OUTTA HERE THIS IS TERRIBLE THIS IS SOME VIDEO GAME SOUNDTRACK SHIT. AFTER THOSE FIRST TWO HEROIN FLOW SMOOTH JOINTS THIS CRAZY COMPUTER CRYSTAL BELL FUNNY SHIT IS JARRING AS FUCK B. THIS NIGGA VOICE IS KINDA GETTING TO ME AND WE ONLY 3 JOINTS IN B. I MAY BE ABLE TO IGNORE THE FACT THAT HE SOUNDS LIKE HELIUMBOT 5000 IF THE NEXT COUPLE JOINTS ARE FIRE.



THE ART OF PEER PRESSURE

IS THIS A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT? THIS BEAT IS BORING AS FUCK B. THIS SHIT SOUNDS LIKE CHRIS MARTIN PRODUCED IT TO SHOW TO KIDS DURING DRUG AWARENESS WEEK OR SOME SHIT. MY GIVE A FUCKOMETER IS RUNNIN OUTTA GAS FOR THIS NIGGA B. BETWEEN THE ANDRE3000 / HELIUMBOT SWAG AND THE 2 SECOND BEATS BEING TERRIBLE AND BORING RESPECTIVELY IDK WHAT MIGHT COULD HAPPEN. GIMME A SECOND IMA GO GET SOME ICE CREAM WHILE I LISTEN TO THIS NEXT JOINT.



MONEY TREES

IDK WHO JAY ROCK IS EITHER BUT HOPEFULLY HE DOESN'T SOUND LIKE A ROBOT. OK SEE NOW IN THIS JOINT KENDRICK DON'T SOUND LIKE A ROBOT, SO IF HE DOES THE ROBOT VOICE ON PURPOSE HE NEEDS TO DEAD THAT SHIT OR STOP PUTTING INSTAGRAM FILTERS ON HIS MIC. THIS BEAT IS OFFICIAL THANK GOD, CUZ I WAS ABOUT TO THROW THIS SHIT IN THE RECYCLE BIN. I CAN SEE WHY NIGGAS COMPARE THIS DUDE TO NAS CUZ SO FAR ALL THESE JOINTS ARE INJECTED WITH COPIOUS AMOUNTS OF KUFI JUICE. HE NEEDS TO STICK TO THE WEED SMOKING ON THE HIGHWAY TYPE BEATS THEY SUIT HIM. ALSO EATING ICE CREAM WHEN I'M DUMB HIGH SUITS ME.




POETIC JUSTICE

THIS SONG STARTED OUT SOUNDIN LIKE SOME SWV SHIT…THEN IT TURNED INTO SOME STUTTERY JUSTIIN TIMBERLAKE ALBUM SHIT. KENDRICK IS DOING DRAKE FLOW TO THE FUUUUULLEST B…ITS FUNNY WHEN NIGGAS GET A FEATURE ON A SONG AND DO THE NIGGAS WHOLE STYLE, I'M NOT EVEN A DRAKE HATER LIKE THAT B I ACKNOWLEDGE WHEN THE NIGGA COMES OFF NAHMEAN? HE DID NOT COME OFF HERE. YO YOU KNOW WHAT I JUST THOUGHT OF? HOW THE FUCK DO THEY MAKE IT SO THAT SHOPPING CARTS DON'T GO OUT THE PARKING LOT? IS IT MAGNETS? CUZ YO THEM SHITS WILL NOT BUDGE OUT THE LOT B. WHAT KINDA TECHNOLOGY IS THAT AND DID NIGGAS JUST STEAL SHOPPING CARTS AT WILL BEFORE THEY INVENTED SHOPPING CART FORCEFIELDS? OH I'M SORRY LEMME PLAY THIS NEXT SONG…



GOOD KID

OH SHIT NIGGA EAGLES ARE SOARING OUT OF MY SPEAKERS B THIS IS THE PRINCE OF PERSIA DEAD PRESIDENTS SOUNDTRACK RIGHT? PHARELL IS 49 YEARS OLD BUT LOOKS LIKE A 12 YEAR OLD JAPANESE BLACK KID. THIS SONG IS COOL ITS THE "TITULAR TRACK" OF THE ALBUM. YO HONESTLY I FUCK WITH EVERYTHING PHARELL DOES B. EVEN WHEN HE WAS LIKE "ARE YOU A MERMAID OR SOMETHING" AND WAS SINGING BULLSHIT ABOUT GIRLS PAINTING THEY TOES AND DOING SUDOKU OR WHATEVER THE FUCK. THIS IS A COOL SONG HE'S RAPPIN ABOUT HOW HE'S SURROUNDED BY GANGS BUT WASN'T INVOLVED IN IT NAHMEAN LIKE HOW HE ROSE ABOVE ALL THE MADNESS AND VIOLEN---ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ




MAAD CITY

MC EIHT IS ON THIS SHIT SO IT NEEDS TO BE SOME GANGSTA SHIT. OH YES!! YES!! THIS IS SOME THUG SHIT!! I FUCKS WITH THIS HEAVYYYYY I'M BOUT TO SHOOT A NIGGA OUT THE WINDOW B!! UNGH!! *PUNCHES WIFE IN FACIAL* YOU KILLED MY COUSIN BACK IN 94 FUCK YO TRUCE!! AHHHHHHH!!!! *CRUSHES A HUMAN SKULL* *CRASHES CAR* *SHOOTS DOWN A HELICOPTER* OHHHHH SHIT THE BEAT SWITCHED UP!! OHHHHHHHH!! EIHT BOUT TO KILL IT!! OH ITS NOT HIM Sad THIS NIGGA KENDRICK IS DOING THE "IM ABOUT TO CRY" FREEWAY FLOW RIGHT NOW AND IT'S NOT DOING IT FOR ME AT ALL RIGHT NOW WOW B. THE BEGINNING OF THIS SHIT HAD ME READY TO CATCH SEVERAL BODIES IN COLD BLOOD NOW ALL I WANNA DO IS GIVE THIS NIGGA A HUG AND TELL HIM NOT TO CRY. *REWINDS SONG TO BEGINNING* MAN DOWN WHERE YOU FROM!!! NIGGA!!! FUCK WHO YOU KNOW WHERE YOU FROM MY NIGGA?!?!?! *PUNCHES COMPUTER IN THE FUCKING FACIAL*



SWIMMING POOLS

*STARTS BOPPING* THIS SHIT GOOOOO! I'LL DRINK PROMETH TO THIS TILL I GIVE MYSELF HEART FAILURE. THIS BEAT IS FUCKIN STUPID B. THIS MIGHT BE THE HARDEST SONG ON THE ALBUM. HOOK IS OFFICIAL THE LIL BREAKDOWN IS FUCKIN TOUGH B. I'M NOT EVEN GONNA SAY ANYTHING FUNNY RIGHT NOW CUZ I NEED YOU TO UNDERSTAND WHAT A DOPE SONG THIS IS B. IF THIS NIGGA DID A WHOLE ALBUM OF HALF SONGS LIKE THAT AND HALF HEROIN FLOW JOINTS LIKE THE FIRST 2 SONGS I WOULD CALL THIS A CLASSIC LIKE EVERY WHITE NIGGA WITH A BEARD IS DOING AT THIS MOMENT.


SING ABOUT ME I'M DYING OF THIRST

THIS SONG IS 12 MINUTES LONG B. I DON'T WANNA LISTEN TO ANYTHING FOR 12 MINUTES. OH WAIT ITS TWO SONGS AIGHT WELL THE FIRST ONE SOUNDS LIKE THE NIGGA IS RAPPING ACAPELLA IN A DENTIST OFFICE THATS PLAYING THE SMOOTH JAZZ STATION WILD LOUD. THE SECOND ONE SOUNDS LIKE THE NIGGA IS RAPPIN OVER A FELA KUTI / ENYA COLLAB. THIS IS THE PERFECT MUSIC TO OVERDOSE ON NYQUIL TO. THIS IS "STARE AT THE CEILING AND EAT A BOTTLE OF PILLS" MUSIC B. I HAVE A FEELING AFTER MAAD CITY AND SWIMMING POOLS THESE LAST TWO JOINTS ARE GONNA BE BASIC LIKE SOLITAIRE.




REAL

LOLOLOL YO DID THIS NIGGA RECORD THIS IN IBIZA WHILE ON 7 GRAMS OF MOLLY, WEARING A VERY SNUG SPEEDO? THIS IS BEACH HOUSE COMPILATION MUSIC B. I'M NOT MAD AT IT BUT IT'S DEFINITELY PUSSY EATING IN THE CABANA TUNEZ B. THIS IS SOME SHIT PHARELL WOULD PRODUCE TO PLAY AT ARMANI EXCHANGE AFTER LISTENING TO MASTERS AT WORK FOR 8 HOURS.




COMPTON

WAIT SO DR. DRE DIDNT PRODUCE THIS? HE JUST RAPPED ON IT? WHAT IS THE POINT OF THIS NIGGA RAPPING A GHOSTWRITTEN VERSE ON A JOINT HE DIDN'T PRODUCE? IS THAT NIGGA INJECTING STEROIDS INTO HIS FRONTAL LOBE? YO…EVEN IF I DIDNT SEE THAT THIS WAS PRODUCED BY JUST BLAZE I WOULD KNOW HE PRODUCED IT CUZ THE SHIT IS LIKE "HOOOOOORN!!!!-CYMBAL CRASH-HOOOOOOOORN!!!!!-CYMBAL CRASH-HOOOOOOOORN!!!!!!-CYMBAL CRASH-HOOOOOOOOORN!!!!!! *DRUM ROLL THING*" THIS IS REALLY REPETITIVE AND BORING AND THIS NIGGA DRE BROKE THE CORNYMETER WITH HIS ABSOLUTE NEED TO NAMEDROP HIS STUPID FUCKING HEADPHONES. NIGGA SHUT UP ABOUT THE FUCKING HEADPHONES I'M NOT APPLE D. AP, DJING A SLUMBER PARTY AT PEREZ HILTON'S HOUSE I DON'T NEED COLORFUL ASS GIANT FUCKIN HEADPHONES GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY DAILY MEDIA INTAKE WITH YOUR PRODUCT PLACEMENT B. I ALREADY SEE ENOUGH 13 YEAR OLDS WEARING THOSE SHITS LIKE IT'S GONNA MAKE LUPE FIASCO NOT SOUND LIKE A FUCKIN JERKOFF WEIRDO.




YO THERES SOME JOINTS ON HERE B. IT'S FUCKIN CRAZY THAT NIGGAS WAS CALLIN THIS SHIT A CLASSIC THOUGH B YOU NIGGAS ARE BUGGIN. A CLASSIC RAP ALBUM CONTAINS NOT ONE JOINT THAT NEEDS TO BE SKIPPED, THIS GOT A COUPLE. THIS IS A GOOD ALBUM BUT I'M NOT DELETING "IT WAS WRITTEN" OFF MY IPHONE TO FIT THIS ON THERE LIKE IT'S COMPARABLE. I KNOW THE INTERNET IS THIRSTY FOR GOOD MUSIC SO THIS GOT BLOWN OUTTA PROPORTION. I FUCK WITH LIKE 55% OF THIS ALBUM B. THAT'S ABOUT IT B I'M OUTTA HERE I GOTTA WAKE UP IN 5 HOURS YOU FUCKIN DICKS. YOU'RE WELCOME SMH.
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